Love is Temporary: And We Should Be Happy for This
Updated: Jun 17, 2019
No doubt all of us have fallen in love a few times, give or take. It can seem like a double edged sword: The highs, the warmth, the completion, followed by the pangs of a sorrowed heart.
But I am here to say that love is worth it. Even through the ups and downs, the coming and going’s, it is always worth it. Not only this; we should actually be THANKFUL that love comes and goes many times in the way that it does.
This is because each lover can teach us so much. They see into the depth of our souls, our personality, our strengths and weaknesses, giving us invaluable advice, while loving us unconditionally all the same. And you repay the exact favour to them. It is simultaneously educational and validating. And it opens us up to humanity.
Then when lovers must part, it can be challenging. But it is for the best. Because while a lover can teach you so much, there is only so much that each lover can teach you. There are more lovers to be had, of equal caliber, each of which will teach you different things. And you have much to teach them also.
How rich a life it will be be, to have many loves, each one diverse, unique, yet equally special. Now sure, you may have just one love at a time, but over the span of a lifetime, may our life be abundant with love, never scarce.
And may we all be on great terms with our lovers of past and present. May we leave each relationship with honour and grace, bowing in gratitude and praise. May we stay connected, not through constant communication, but in spirit. May good-will fill the air, with possible communication on occasion, yet only when relevant and healthy.
After having many loves, enjoying each one thoroughly and learning through pleasure and pain, we will reach a mature age where the fruits of experience and wisdom are ripe. We know what want; what works for us and what doesn’t. At a point of maturity, I see the ideal of finding a love for life; a life-partner, a husband or wife. Loneliness can be a real thing, and I think everyone is deserving and worthy of having someone to love. And I have belief that a man performs and functions at his highest when the right woman is by his side. And this is equally true for women. Each gender is able to give certain shades of guidance and support, a clarity and a strength, that may not be there otherwise. After sampling many lovers, we may choose from the smorgasbord of lovers past and present, and with the help of mutuality, divine timing and convenience, we do find a love for life. Not too soon, but when it is right.
Yes of course we must find independence, our personal completion and totality, functionality and fulfilment. The chapters where we are single is the dojo for building such personal power.
Yet my statement remains that love can serve us so much, whether it’s the transient roller-coasters of young love, or the long burning coal of mature love. It provides us with education, validation, strength and selflessness. It opens us up to humanity.
So we should never close our heart. We should keep our heart open, willing to love abundantly, through the pleasure and pain. To cut ourselves off from the highs and lows of life, out of fear, is to live a life not fully experienced.
Each new love has new things to teach us. And new opportunities for us to be the teacher. This is why we should be thankful that love is transient, in a sense. Yet is is also everlasting, another sense. Love does not change, but structures change.
Independence is great. But the essence of life is found in connection. This is a universal principle. May we find totality within ourselves and with others.
And we may find those who resonate with us the most.